The Politics of Staying Connected: Common Ground Still Exists

"Do you know what ACAP means? It means all cops are pigs! Why would you post something like that?" My dad’s voice booms over the phone. 

I sit frozen in my car, staring blankly at my apartment building. All cops are pigs? I would never post that. My dad is a cop; my brother is a cop. My stomach sinks as I frantically tap my screen, searching for the post on Facebook. 

"What post? I thought it just said Black Lives Matter." 

"Look closer. It’s right there. You have no idea what you're talking about." 

I scan the image over and over, searching the picture, the page name, and the empty comment section. My dad continues his lecture while I spiral—embarrassed that I shared something without knowing its hidden meaning and frustrated that he is so certain I intend to publicly condemn him. 

As he lays into me, years of feeling misunderstood and unresolved conflicts boil over. I fire back, pointing out the faults in the police force. When the fight reaches a record-breaking peak, I scream an expletive and hang up. 

I was twenty, living in a new state, adjusting to early adulthood during a pandemic. If I knew then what I know now, I would have responded with compassion. Instead, I deleted the post and decided it was safer to keep my political opinions to myself. For the next five years, I felt embarrassed every time I scrolled past "ACAP" and frustrated every time I saw a "Back the Blue" bumper sticker. 

According to a 2025 study published in PNAS Nexus, 37% of Americans reported having experienced a “political breakup”—the loss of a relationship because of political differences. Friends were the most common relationships affected. Those who reported a political breakup were more hostile toward their political opponents, particularly opposing voters rather than party elites. After reviewing the study, I planned to write about increasing polarization. Further investigation led me to a more important question: has America reached a pivotal moment, one in which our response could finally make us proud of our country again, or deepen our division? 

We are increasingly tuning out our country 

According to a 2025 national survey from the U.S. Chamber of Commerce Foundation, 58% of American adults failed a basic civics test, even though 74% of us were confident we could explain how government works to someone from another country. In 2023, Pew Research Center found that 28% of Americans hold unfavorable views of both major parties, while 25% say neither party represents them well. The survey also found that 79% of Americans used negative or critical terms to describe their feelings about politics, with “divisive” and “corrupt” appearing most frequently. In a separate 2026 study, Pew Research Center found that only 9% of Americans said they follow the news because they enjoy it, 60% had reduced their overall news intake, while 16% said they do not follow the news at all.  

Common ground still exists 

According to a 2021 Diversity and Division in Advanced Economies survey, countries with ethnic diversity were linked to more agreement on racial bias but experienced more political disagreement. This made me curious whether we had common ground during the early months of the 2020 pandemic and Black Lives Matter movement. According to a 2020 Harvard Kennedy School/NORC National Survey, most Americans believed fundamental rights were in danger, were not being adequately protected and were not being properly upheld by the government or the public. A Hidden Common Ground survey conducted in June 2020, majorities of Democrats, Republicans and Independents agreed on several areas of police reform. In a separate 2020 Hidden Common Ground survey, Americans generally agreed that Covid-19 posed a serious threat to the United States, the stock market and the global economy. They also accepted government assistance for affected businesses and individuals. 

Why does common ground disappear in the media? 

When researching how Americans have been able to miss so much beautiful, constructive ground we stand on together, I found two experts that offer their insights. Professor and director of the Polarization Lab at Duke University, Chris Bail argues in his book Breaking the Social Media Prism that social media acts as a prism, allowing us to only see a hostile environment of rage bait from a few extremists that is rewarded by the algorithm. Moving from social media to the more authoritative newsrooms; Leader of the Solidarity Journalism Initiative at the Center for Media Engagement, Dr. Anita Varma states in her 2025 article that mainstream media faces a serious credibility crisis by focusing more on powerful officials and less on real communities and citizens directly affected by the issues being covered. In conclusion, attention, whether positive or negative, may encourage people and institutions to repeat behavior to maintain visibility and control. We are spending too much time critiquing opposing voters and party elites on what we think they are saying, and not enough time showing each other real life examples of what we mean. As well as providing realistic ways for us to help— those of us who are already so busy with school, work, children, aging parents, and financial insecurity.  

Repair requires more than agreement 

Healthy debate leads to constructive growth. Our nation's founding fathers built this principle into the foundation of our country by establishing a democratic government. There are activists, organizations, newsrooms and grassroots groups passionately fighting to make America's strengths, and weaknesses we can realistically fix, more visible. Braver Angels is an organized social movement fighting to restore basic respect in public debate through hosting workshops, events, and training sessions where people from opposite ends of the political spectrum meet to talk. The Depolarization Institute is a nonprofit focused on reducing social and political conflict. They combine strategic research with creative projects, like the "Art of Repair" to help people visualize a less divided society. The Objective is a nonprofit newsroom that analyzes how journalists and other staff are treated at work, how reporters interact with and represent the people they cover and experiment with new, possibly fairer ways to create and share news. Public Agenda’s Hidden Common Ground is a public engagement initiative. Its main purpose is to challenge the idea that Americans are completely divided and unable to work together. 

Connection is a choice 

Unfortunately, many of us are faced with the hard reality that not all relationships were destined to heal. There are reports of a deepening crisis in American democracy and a loneliness epidemic on the horizon. More of us are checking out, retreating into doomscrolling, and turning to rapidly advancing AI for connection and problem-solving. When I zoom out, I see that these issues are connected because we are connected—whether we talk to each other or not. We don’t fear technology. We created it and integrated deep into our lives. What we fear is how we might misuse it and ultimately destroy ourselves. We distrust our government because we distrust each other. Our government can only be as strong as the friendships, families, and communities it serves. 

The political fight I had with my dad didn’t cause us to go no-contact. Our issues were about much more than a policy. We had spent so long seeing only the worst in each other that, sooner or later, we were bound to take turns giving each other the cold shoulder. In the end, it depends on whether we both value the relationship enough to fight for it.